The Fifth Elephant
Overview
'Ah... I see that the new traffic division is having the desired
effect.' He indicated a large pile of paper. 'I am getting any amount of
complaints from the Carters' and Drovers' Guild. Well done. Do pass on my
thanks to sergeant Colon and his team.'
'I will, sir.'
'I see in one day they clamped seventeen carts, ten horses, eighteen oxen and
one duck.'
'It was parked illegally, sir.'
[p. 24, Vetinari and Vimes; submitted by Keith Knowles]
He was Igor, son of Igor, nephew of several Igors, brother of Igors and cousin of more Igors than he could remember without checking up in his diary. Igors did not change a winning formula. {Footnote: Especially if it was green, and bubbled.}
[p. 65]
Knowledge, information, power, words... fluing through the air, invisible...
And suddenly the world was tap-dancing on quicksand.
In that case, the prize went to the best dancer.
[p. 77]
What would be the point of cyphering messages that ery clever enemies couldn't break? You'd end up not knowing what they thought you thought they were thinking...
[p. 83, Vetinari]
All Hell hadn't been let loose. It was merely Detritus. But from a few feet away you couldn't tell the difference.
[p. 163]
'They come back to the mountains to die,' said the King.
'They live in Ankh-Morpork.'
[p. 232]
'Are you Death?'
IT'S THE SCYTHE, ISN'T IT? PEOPLE ALWAYS NOTICE THE SCYTHE.
[p. 336, submitted by Jens Kleine]
IT'S BECAUSE OF THE UNCERTAINITY PRINCIPLE.
'What's that?'
I'M NOT SURE.
[p. 336]
ARE YOU FAMILIAR WITH THE WORDS 'DEATH WAS HIS CONSTANT COMPANION'?
'But I don't usually see you!'
[p. 343, submitted by Jens Kleine]
The true prize was control. Lord Vetinari knew that. When heavy weights were balanced on the scales, the trick was to know where to place your thumb.
[p. 388]
If you [Carrot] were dice, you'd always roll sixes.
And the dice don't roll themselves. If it wasn't against everything he wanted to be true about the world, Vimes might just then have believed in destiny controlling people. And gods help the other people who were around when a big destiny was alive in the world, bending every poor bugger around itself...
[p. 412]
It was all too complicated, and where it was complicated, it meant that someone was trying to fool you. But on the street, in hot pursuit, it was all so clear. Someone was going to be still standing at the end of the chase, and all you had to concentrate on was making sure it was you.' [p. 425, submitted by Alice Howard]
It was not, it could not be real.
But in the roaring air he knew that it was, for all who needed to believe, and in a belief so strong that truth was not the same as fact... he knew that for now, and yesterday, and tomorrow, both the thing, and the whole of the thing.
[p. 438]
All he [Vimes] knew was that you couldn't hope to try for the big stuff, like world peace and happiness, but you might just about be able to achieve some tiny deed that'd make the world, in a small way, a better place.
Like shooting someone.
[p. 447]